England, sweet England...

Returning to England in January after a year away is quite possibly one of the lowest points in my life so far. There are a lot of factors at work here involved in my despair and actually some of the time, I think its good to be back. I realise I’m not in Darfur, Iraq or some of the other more horrifying places on the planet to live, but England with its grey skies, its air of aggression and the general hectic ness of life, is pretty intense at times. Adding to my blackness has been a massive bout of jetlag, which lasted a week or so and then just as I thought I was getting over that, a nice, big cold with a thoroughly enjoyable dry, tickly, hacking cough has come to stay. Great. On top of all of this my mind has been full of weighty decisions that have to be made in the very near future. Where should we live? Brighton? The outskirts? Somewhere else in England? Australia? When we’ve decided where to live then we obviously have to find the right property and potentially get a preposterously, sickeningly large mortgage. Possibly £200,000. Gulp. Oh and then organise a wedding, and reproduce. Yup its finally time at the age of 35 that I have to do ‘adult’ things. Did I mention that we start back at work tomorrow? No? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
So you see, I’ve been a trifle out of sorts  The biggest come down ever after the biggest party ever I guess. If I haven’t been very good at getting back in contact with you all then hopefully you’ll understand where my head is at and rest assured I’ll be back to my normal self shortly.
On a positive tip some things are good to get back to. Seeing everyone after so long has been very, very good indeed. and its extra specially good to be staying in Helen’s luxury house till we get our act together. Hanging out with Hel, walking the sausage dogs, doing a bit of cooking and lounging about has been just what the Dr ordered. Also nice is to be able to watch some good old fashioned British Tv and see some damn good films too. Last night I finally watched the whole of The Hostel and almost as good as watching the film, was watching Helen cowering behind a cushion as she tried to avoid seeing daft Yanks being tortured. Getting my computer back up and running had been great and after 3 days of trying to make my synth work, it now does and it’s been f**king brilliant to be making some music again! I’ve not done anything concrete yet, but just getting back in that musical saddle again, remembering how the software works, has all been good. I’m using Acid Pro 5 and Fruity Loops currently, although as soon as I’m hooked up on broadband again, I think I’ll be grabbing Acid 6 from somewhere and seeing what number the latest Cubase is up to.
Walking around Brighton I've noticed alot of new graffiti here and there and very good it is too. It's good to see some nice art work adorning the shabbier bits of town, mind you London road is still a shit hole, oh yeah, you can swear on my blog now if you want Alex ;)
More thoughts from me coming to this blog soon.

Return to Blighty

The last two days of our stay on Rarotonga have seen the sun reappear, like some kind of tease and have also led to the discovery of a goat that has a center hair parting, in fact, exactly like Jamie used to have, many moons ago :)
We went to 'Island Night' at a local bar and were surprised to discover that unlike the many huge Polynesian specimens on display around the island, this night featured some of the more lithe, younger Cook Islanders who danced away to the furious drumming of their elders like it was some kind of Pacific rave. The drumming was so good, I bought the CD and intend to sample it to death and then sell it to the highest bidder, Mwah ha ha!
We've just returned our faithful moped to its owners and are about to settle down for a final bout of suntanning at the pool before we get on the plane tonight. The moped was great, I love riding them, especially not having to wear a helmet, it's one of life's simple pleasures. It of course brought back memories of riding about Vietnam and the rest of South East Asia, brilliant days!

That's it. That's really it. The final blog of our year away, it seems like it's been, ooh, a year long and at the same time, like no time at all since we left. What a year it's been for us, quite simply the best year of our lives. It's pretty hard sitting here trying to articulate the words to sum up all the different experiences we've had that have made this year so incredible. The highlights of the trip for me have been many, but the standouts, never-to-be-forgotten moments would include:
Getting engaged: You don't forget that kind of thing in a hurry and I think I found the most perfect spot in New Zealand for it.
Japan: I'm still blown away by that place, except for it being a bit cold at times, I couldn't fault anything about it. Tokyo is a city of dizzying contrasts and excitement that I'm really looking forward to exploring again, I could bang on and on about everywhere we went and how good it all was, but I spent a month doing that last January, I even enjoyed hanging out with Alex, Eremi and Ant!
Borneo: Another amazing country. The wildlife there is something else, seeing Orang Utans in the wild and walking through the jungle was superb.
Sipadan: The best diving of my life, jaw-dropping, breath-taking underwater experiences that will live with me forever.
The Gibbon Experience: Being terrified as a storm raged around us in a tree house 50 meters off the ground may not sound fun, but something I would recommend anyone to do, absolutely mental :)
Western Australia: What a surprise, that Oz would be such a great place. Especially Western Oz, outstanding scenery and wildlife made for an unforgettable time.
Angkor Wat: 40 degree temperatures were pretty hard to take, but we sweated our way round the worlds biggest temple for 3 days and it was awesome.

In fact almost every day was outstanding, some days we actually rowed (I know that's hard to believe), some days we just spent washing, interneting, at the post office, but even then it was good, because we weren't at work and we were doing and seeing things that the majority of people will never do. Travelling, how I hate that term, but travelling none the less, is probably something that I should have done years ago when I was just a lad, I'd have probably spent the next decade continuing to travel about, but I feel that being a cynical, wizened 30 something year old has made me really appreciate even more everything we've done. It's a year that when I'm on my death bed (if I'm in bed), thinking about my life and what I've done with it and hopefully they'll be a lot more time yet to fill with family, friends and other amazing experiences, but it'll be one of those things that I'll look back on and be satisfied that I really lived my life in that period.
Well that's it folks, we hope you've enjoyed our blog as much as we've enjoyed writing it, I know its tough, but you'll all have to get back on with your lives now. If it's any consolation we'll be back in your lives in good old England come Monday morning.
A massive thanks to everyone who put Comments on our blog and who sent us emails, we love you guys :)


We're coming home :)

Paradise Lost

The penultimate blog of our year away, I can't believe its all but over. In 4 days time we're going to be touching down in sunny England and the magical place that is Heathrow, mmmmmm.
The last few days have found us doing very, very little again, this time not because we've been lazing about in the sun, but because its been raining. Raining solid for the last 4 days. Its been pretty much the longest 4 days of my life, cooped up in our little bungalow, reading, playing a bit of PlayStation, knitting ( a lot of) moaning about the weather (aren't we always) and then escaping the tedium of the day as night falls to go out to a restaurant. Yep I know we're not at work and I know we're not freezing in England, but Rarotonga is officially the most boring place on the planet .... when its raining, there is literally nothing to do, so why have I stuck a photo of a lionfish on the blog. The day before the heavens opened on us I went diving once again and once again Sam pulled out at the last second, claiming that the rain the previous night and the clouds that morning would spoil her experience, these days our Samantha will settle for nothing less than perfection. The dive company have subsequently banned her from diving with them as she keeps cancelling at the last second :) The dives were very pleasant, the visibility pretty good and a reasonable amount of fish about to keep my interest up, Rarotonga isn't the Barrier Reef, but its not the English Channel either.

Some of the boredom of the last few days has been lessened by meeting some very nice 'normal' people. It's typical, you go away for a whole year, meeting tons of people along the way, the majority turning out to be fools and then right at the end you meet some genuinely nice ones. Namely a couple of Scots, Ronny and Alison and all the way from Bristol and er Macclesfield, Chris and Amy. We've been hanging out at various bars and restaurants these last few nights, escaping the rabble at our guesthouse and generally having a marvellous time. We look forward to meeting up for some more beers with you guys in a nice cold, smoky pub in England!
We're off to 'Island Night' tonight to watch some preposterously fat Polynesians dance and sing for us, Hoorah!
Final thoughts coming to a blog near you very soon.




Just Read: The Pilo Family Circus by Will Elliott - Psychotic clowns, Jamie you would love this book!






Listening to: Aphex Twin - Drukqs

Lazy Melts

At this stage in the game, we have become extremely lazy. Given our year of ultimate excitement and doing, I have reasoned that this is acceptable behavior. We've been here for a week (possibly?) and so far we've done very, very little. The first 5 days were spent pool-side, listening to the youngsters at our hostel talk a load of boring drivel. All that 'where've you been, where you going next?' which seems to be the standard format for every interaction when you're on the road. By day five I was feeling somewhat mental, the cabin-fever at an almost intolerable level. But as the island had been shut for 4 days over New Year, there wasn't much we could do about it. The knitting reached prolific heights, even in the heat and severe humidity. It was time to get mobile. We went on a mission to find a moped. In the Cook Islands, you need to acquire a driving license before you hit the road, or at least that's the order in which you'd assume things to go. So out we went, got the bus into 'town,' hopped off to find the police station. Three police stations later, it was discovered that no, you have to hire a bike first, drive to the police station and THEN sit your test. A very hot and sweaty mission it turned out to be, especially as there weren't any drink-selling shops open. You could have bought black pearls (big business over here) all over town that day, but not a bottle of water in sight. Finally, the next day, three bike shops and another couple of bus journeys later, Andy was sitting his test. This involved going 100 meters down the road in a big group with a very grumpy policeman in pursuit. Eventually, after a bit of a wait and a prison-photo, we had a moped.

Hurray! We could now escape the confines of Rarotonga Backpackers. It's actually a very nice little place and quite cheap (not that I want cheap, but apparently the luxury boutiques are out of the question 'at this stage.') The pool is tiny but provides adequate wallowing facilities. Much more interesting and tropical though, is the beach. It's your classic stereotype of a south Pacific Island... palm trees, white sand, warm 27 degree crystal-clear sea, dotted with big mammas and the occasional snorkeler seeking out sea-cucumbers. A delicacy in Asia and Rarotonga, you bite off the head and suck the spaghetti-like innards from inside while it's still wriggling. It's not all bad though, because if you throw them back in the sea, they will regenerate new insides and become whole again. Mmmm!
Snorkeling is pretty special, with numerous large pipe fish, pufferfish, butterfly fish and boxfish.

Slightly annoying though, is the ever-menacing trigger-fish, our well-known enemy. This time it's the prevalent Picasso triggerfish which is the nasty one, it's main aim in life to take chunks out of holiday makers in the name of protecting their territory. Evil. Andy went on a couple of dives this morning, but I did my usual trick of chickening out at the last minute. There were two factors at play in the brain - 1. I'd had absolutely no sleep after we'd had to move out of our bungalow and into a tiny double room which offers no solitude from the backpacker crowd 2. There's been a massive storm during the night, and I was a bit scared that the visibility would be rubbish and it would be choppy out. Apparently I didn't miss much as we saw more snorkeling yesterday, even though Andy did his first wreck dive.

One of the most striking things about Rarotonga is the numerous colourful graves dotted about. Usually, relatives are buried in the back garden of local houses, but there are some enormous graveyards as well. Since the missionaries arrived here in 1821, Christianity has played a big role in island life. Some people even go to church as a tourist activity, but this is mainly because everybody gets a free lunch afterwards! So, zooming along on the moped (40 minutes to go round the whole island!), you see these colourful sights, churches, signs for posh resorts (mercifully hidden from my view), locals heading out wearing bright shirts and a flower tucked behind their ears. Behind the left means you're single, behind the right indicates you're taken for). Quite often, you have to swerve to miss the odd piglet or chicken, but as the speed-limit is 40 kph (20kph in the town!) this doesn't pose much of a problem.

Cook Islanders are Polynesians, closely related to the Maoris of NZ and Tahiti and first settled here around 1500 years ago. The Europeans landed a 1,000 years later and in 1773 Captain Cook spotted the islands, but didn't actually land on Rarotonga. He then went on to meet his demise in Hawaii where he was stabbed to death in 1779, and William Bligh one of his crew went onto lead the infamous Mutiny on the Bounty a decade thereafter. The missionaries brought lots of nasty diseases with them like smallpox and dysentery which wiped out a few of the locals at that time. They did a good job of stopping the practice of cannibalism though, a torturous method involving skewering the victim on a spear and then barbecuing over an open fire so as to remove the hair and cuticles. Then the body was steamed in an underground oven and shared equally amongst the tribal warriors. The most prized cuts were the thighs and the intestines and the women weren't allowed to join in. Today, there are 14,000 laid back, friendly Rarotongan inhabitants, ambling along with 16,000 pigs! It's so laid-back it's difficult to stand up sometimes and in this heat, there seems little point in exerting oneself unnecessarily. One week to go, maybe we should do something tomorrow?






Currently drinking : Vailima, a Samoan brew with a nice label.








Currently Reading : The Crow Road, by the inimitable Iain Banks.

Worst Film of the Year : Eragon. An unsurprisingly dreadful tale about a dragon written by a 17 year old (you can tell).






Best Film of the Week : Marie Antionette. A film about lovely frocks and cakes.